Now, speaking from the point of
view as someone who has been both single and in long-term relationships before
I want to ask the question: why is it that some people are never satisfied with
what they have? You hear all types of horror stories on both ends of the
spectrum from that single guy or gal desperately clinging onto the idea that
love is all they need to be happy to the couple who might appear happy-go-lucky
on the outside but on the inside there’s turmoil and frustration.
I see so many men and women wishing to be in
relationships with someone who has similar interests but this cannot happen
when we’re being pushed away BECAUSE of having similarities. Do opposites
attract? My simple answer without getting into too many details is no.
Opposites might bring out the best in each other or bring new ideas to the
table, but what about all these men who have girlfriends/wives who only tolerate their hobbies and put limits on
them when it comes to ‘gaming time’ and ‘girlfriend time’, the time between the
two is pushed away as if to say “I’m here now so it’s time to put away the
childish games and be a serious adult”.
What? Did you just say that? Now
here is the best part, when a guy starts to resent the time spent with his
lovely girlfriend/wife due to disagreements on how they spend their time
together. Eventually, without compromise and respect, the relationship will
come to a rocky end (or a smooth one if you both mutually agree to see other
people). There are so many people out
there wishing for a ‘nerdy girlfriend/boyfriend’, yet when opportunity knocks
on their door they don’t open it. If it is opened, someone is eventually going
to get tired of the similarities and start looking elsewhere.
Take for example, my own current
boyfriend whom I have been dating for two years now. We met in a gaming store,
bonded over our similar hobbies and personality differences (I’m a Capricorn
while he’s an Aquarius, which is as different in personas as you can get), and
entered into an exclusive relationship not long after. Before I came along he
had only dated women who could tolerate the things he liked and barely partook
in any activities unless it was to advance the relationship itself. Now that he
had found a woman who could completely understand his interests, he was happy…
for some time. I asked recently what he thought of couples who shared similar
interests and unfortunately, the old saying holds true. He believes that
‘opposites attract’.
Imagine my frustration, knowing
that I found someone who understood my ‘geek speech’ and would listen to me
ramble about the newest Elder Scrolls or even a spark of interest in table-top
gaming, but after so long only really enjoyed having someone who was like them
fifty percent of the time. Are you kidding me? So beyond women being alienated
in everything ranging from conventions, to gaming, to comics it’s now somewhat
affecting out dating life as well? FML.
So guys (girls even), when you ask
for something and it’s given to you in the form of a person please try to
appreciate what you have. For every man who doesn’t appreciate a woman who
likes Marvel and DC comics, there’s one who will. For every woman who waves off
her man while complaining that he’s not paying her enough attention when all it
takes is a co-op game to get them to do an activity together, there’s a woman
out there for him.
Dating isn’t easy, marriage is even
harder, but if you love and care about someone enough you may see that what is
in front of you could be the cream of the crop.
